Thursday, November 19, 2009

Friends (not the TV show)

Don't you just love how kids can make friends?

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Image from here

All it takes it seems is to in the general vicinity of a kid roughly your age, and voila!

GG joined me on a coffee date this morning, and met A for the first time. GG is 2, A is 3. Their eyes met shyly over babycinos, then 5 minutes later, there were bolting off to the horsey ride together. In the car on the way home, GG announced, "A my friend, my nice friend." Awww.

I've always been kind of funny about making friends. I like to think I'm a good friend, I still have friends I met in primary school, I'm a typical Capricorn, very loyal, but once you've crossed me, you're done. I find it hard to make new friends as a grown up though. Since we've moved to the Gold Coast (well, moved back - I grew up here), I've kinda wanted to expand my group of local friends. I've got plenty of lovely friends, but they're all kind of scattered, and I'd like some more available to catch up with (it's all about me, obviously). The few friends I have still on the Coast from last time I lived here are lovely, but there's like 3 of them. Where do I go? It's not like there's a playground I can skulk around the edges of and see who I like the look of, like when you start a new school.

Plus, it seems a bit weird and sad and clinical to be "friend-hunting", doesn't it. Which makes it bizarre and tragic that I'm publicly talking about it! Hmmmm...

I have met a few of people who've become very dear friends through the usual work, ante-natal class etc., and it's been easy as pie. I wonder if that's because I wasn't actually looking for a friend. Now I sometimes feel like a Bridget Jones-esque single, strategising where to meet suitable friends, how to approach them. In short, overanalysing like I always do.

Maybe I should take a leaf out of GG's book and just chill. "Hey! You like parks too? Let's be friends!". Yeah, I'm sure that'll keep me out of the loony bin...



  1. Oh I SO hear you. It is like the next stage of life, I met with some women for coffee the other day and was so nervous?? Felt like I was on a first date because desperately wanted them to like me -- (in small town with slim pickings) hahahaha, this is common ( i think?? ) we need to brainstorm. You are right, maybe the kids have got the right idea here... they make friends so easily

  2. Kids can make friends easily and friendships flex and bow for children very easily too. Recall when a child announces that 'such and such is not my friend anymore'? When we are little that announcement is all we need to move on - as we get older we become angst ridden, we need to toe lines of political correctness, be appropriately attentive etc etc. Sometimes it is hard work to maintain a friendship as an adult.

  3. I'm with you!!! I wish I could make friends easily too...doesn't help being slightly on the socially-anxious side. I have a good group of friends back in India but since coming here to Sydney 5 years ago, I have made a few close friends through uni but long for some friends that are not psychologists. But it's so bloody hard!!! I wish I could be as uninhibited as children are when it comes to making friends. :)

    Oh...and I'm Capricorn too!!! =)

  4. If you didn't live in Qld I'd so look you up for a playdate!
    I've read (& posted) about this on quite a few mummy Blogs, seems to be the norm, probably why we are all Bloggers!!!
    I am just breaking back into the real world after a long time of 'quarantine' with 2 year old, it's hard finding mums who 'get' that K gets sick really easily from being prem & not just think I'm an overprotective mum.
    It feels like High School all over again! Bleargh!


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