Tuesday, February 23, 2010

Another dilemma...

Once again, I find myself lying awake at night, dithering and obsessing over should I or shouldn't I do something.

Here's the story. Yesterday, while I was dropping GG at her kindy, I was really disappointed in the behaviour of one of the staff members. She's not GG's direct carer, but when they are all outside playing in the common area, she would possibly be responsible for supervising her, depending on whereabouts GG chooses to play.

What I'm dithering over is whether or not to speak to or email the Centre Manager and express my concern. To dob or chill out, basically.

Here's the situation. When I dropped GG off, this girl was responsible for overseeing the area outside GG's room, it's basically an enclosed outdoor room, minus one wall, which leads out to a big yard. Under her lack of care, two or three boys, including one school aged boy there for before school care, were throwing and frisbee-ing these rubber rings around. It doesn't sound like much, but they were flinging them pretty hard around the room where lots of the littler kids were playing (and where GG wanted to play, cos that's where her friends were).

Now, this chick couldn't have seemed less concerned with what was going on around her. Not only was she trying to get them to move outside, or stop all together, she was praising them!! "Oh, that's a big throw!" etc.

As I'm standing there wondering whether or not it's my place to say something to her or the boys, sure enough, a little boy gets hit smack in the face. He bursts into tears and after initally telling him, "Oops, you're okay, hop up, la-la-la" she finally gets off her arse and comes over and takes him inside to put some ice on his eye. She catches my eye as she passes and seems a little surprised to see me looking so clearly unimpressed.

The boys go on chucking the rings with abandon and I'm getting kind of pissed off now. Just then another carer arrives to start her day and takes in the situation.

I'm not sure what do say, so I settle for, "C'mon GG, we'll go play over there, these boys are playing too rough." (Yes, I do enjoy my passive-agressiveness, very much, thank you).

Carer Mark 2 immediately tells the boys to go down the back of the yard where there are less kids if they want to keep playing the game. "But whhhyyyyyy?" whinges School Boy. The words are out of my mouth before I even think, "Because you just hit one little kid, and I don't want you to hit my little girl." This is said with a bit of a growl that I just couldn't help.

Anyhoo, that's pretty much the deal, what I'm now torn over is whether or not to leave it there, both carers will be in no doubt as to my opinion, or whether to say something to the Centre Manager about how I am disappointed that the first girl didn't manage the boy's behaviour better and prevent anyone from getting hurt in the first place.

Now, I don't want to be the Fun Police, or the Whingey-Bitch Parent type, I'm usually pretty laid-back about the inevitable bumps and knocks kids get just doing what kids do, but I do think if I say something, maybe I will stop GG being the next kid who gets hurt unnecessarily. Am I out of line here? What would you do?

It's hard enough to leave your children in care, what if you don't trust the people who may be watching over them?



  1. Wow, that IS a predicament. Once again, I'm not a parent, so I have NO idea what I'm talking about, but I think I'd say something. My husband has taught me that it's perfectly fine to voice your opinion (particularly where your CHILD is concerned!), but it's all about the words you choose and the tone of your voice.

    I think I would say something, but I would be very calm and thoughtful when I did! Hope that helps!!

  2. Say something. I've been there where I wasn't happy with the care being provided to my son at his child care centre and they took it very seriously.

    Like you I didn't say anything at the time. I just called the next day and spoke to the manager who listened and then actioned.

    In my case they even provided me with a letter outlining what action had been taken to prevent reoccurance.

    I figure that you are paying enough for them to take care of your family so therefore you have the right to say something. Another way of looking at it - if you ordered something at a restuarant and it wasn't cooked probably you'd send it back.

    Good luck.

  3. I would absolutely say something. Especially since a child was hurt due to a caregivers neglect of the issue arising from that scenario.. Hello as an adult we are supposed to SEE the issue of safety before the kids DUHH.. Say something period..

  4. I would say something as well. I do think I would speak in person rather than emailing. You can focus your concern on the danger issue rather than singling the care giver out as a lazy inattentive asshat... suggesting that the older kids should've been 'throwing' in a different area away from the younger children.

    You are GG's mother and have every right to be conerned. The Centre manager should listen and take action.

  5. The thing is, I spent most of an hour yesterday afternoon trying to peg second grade boys with dodgeball type things whilst they rode around on skates.


    I can see I'm part of the problem here...

  6. Those boys were WRONG and should have been corrected. The person 'in charge' was WRONG for not correcting them, especially after they hurt someone.
    Younger people just do not know responsibility. That 'carer' for one. She should be taught.
    I think you have enough justification to 'ask' about the incident and see if anything was done.

  7. Certainly share your concern with the Centre Manager. Maybe the boys had been playing there to begin with before the little kids got there and the caregiver just didn't think to ask them to move. You never know, but if you don't discuss it with the Manager, the caregiver will not learn to think ahead.

  8. If I had something insightful to add, I'd be all over it. But I read through all the comments and I'm just going to go with "I agree". Good luck. ;)

  9. If you approach it calmly it will be fine, but be very careful. You do not want the reputation as "THAT" parent.

    By one who was that parent.

  10. As a teacher, I always appreciate it if a parent has a problem they come to me first before going to my superior. Mainly because my boss is a giant wench, but that's another story. If you think it would make a difference I'd talk directly to the carer. If you think it won't matter then go to the supervisor. Or maybe tell her first and then tell the supervisor regardless.

  11. It is good to express your concerns rather than let them fester. The tone in which you address the situation can also determine the outcome, so I know when I am most upset, I have to exhale, and smile so they do not know I want someone's hiney in a sling! lol Good luck!

  12. Please tell the manager! One of the companies in our group is a child care, and this is exactly what we want to hear. We are not there 24/7 and can't see these things happening. We usually only find out when a parent gets so mad, they leave! Give the owners a chance to address the issue. We want to know if the carer's we hire are as good as they seem, but we want to know more if they are not!

    Its not just for your child's sake, but for the sake of all of them.

    Also, this is your child's welfare we are talking about, and nothing is too much where that is concerned. Not only are you trusting these people in your absence, you are PAYING them for it!

    We have VERY strict criteria for the kind of care we must provide by law. And carer's are trained to meet these criteria. There si no excuse for allowing a potentially dangerous situation.

  13. Oh, geeze... I don't even know. I can imagine how it felt to stand there and watch what you knew was going to happen as it did happen and the just do the passive aggressive thing as the new care giver got there, but really? You made your point and hopefully they won't be so sloppy with this particular activity.

  14. Whenever I drop Jazz at kindy, I always notice one or two of the carers being complete slack asses. The centre is great but honestly, most of these girls are barely out of their 20s.

    I always make a point of wiping some snotty kids face (insert loud comment), stopping some kid being an ass and involving some other child in a game or telling them some kid needs an obvious nappy change. I don't care if I'm a bitch. I'm always polite but they get the gist of what I'm *politely* saying. If you are looking after my child, I will be watching you.

  15. I think you should say something too. You'd hate it if some really awful injury happened and you hadn't. This is the type of thing that makes me spooked about child care. It's the one bad egg that ruins it for all the hard working, wonderful carers out there. Boo to Miss-Lazy-Pants!


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