Slackness, thy name is Quixotic

So about a million years ago, Soy Mami y Mas awarded me the Versatile Blogger Award.

There. Innit pretty? I'm really still thrilled to get these little awards, even though *polishes nails on her lapel* I've gotten quite a few by now. And Versatile certainly sums up my schizophrenic subject matter.

I have enjoyed Connie's blog for quite a while now, and after wondering for ages what the title meant, and thanks to Google Translator, was very pleased to find out it means "I am Mum and more". This sums her up very well, she writes beautifully about her miraculous blessing of a daughter, as well as some really deep stuff.

Now, the rules that are bestowed along with this blog say I have to tell you seven things about myself, but honestly, there's not a lot I haven't covered before. Which is why, lucky reader, I have decided to take up Tulpen's tag on her blog, Bad Words. This chick is seriously cool, hilarious and refuses to let raising two kids, one with special needs, make her grow up. She recently tagged me to answer eight questions of her own making, so you are getting real value for money here people!

1: Desert island time: What kind of chips do you bring?
You read my mind. I have been totally craving Pringles chips (original flavour, sour cream at a pinch) lately, and have been known to destroy a whole tube in one episode of House.

2: Speaking of chips. Double dip: Yes or No? Come on, nobody is watching.
At home, absolutely! Out, only when my margarita intake has surpassed my social conditioning.

3: You can only have ONE; your computer or your TV?
Duh, the computer, cause I can watch TV on it anyway.

4: Cheesecake: Proof that God exists and wants you to be happy, and fat. Yes or no?
Hmm. Proof that God exists and wants me to be happy, and proof that the devil will always punish happiness!

5: Farts are always funny. Yes or no?
Sometimes funnny, sometimes a Career Limiting Move. Depends on your boss. No, I don't want to elaborate.

6: Got kids? Watch Disney or Nick? What's your favorite? Don't got kids? You're watching way better TV than I am. You suck.
Ah yes, kid's shows. The only thing I seem to get to watch regularly these days. I am quite partial to Jane and the Dragon, and the old favourites Sesame St and Play School. My 3 year old Gorgeous Gal's favourite show? Masterchef.

7: Glee?
Yes please. Why couldn't my school have had show choir? Oh right, it probably did, but I was too busy being a bad girl and smoking and kissing boys behind the bike sheds.

I wish more of life was narrated by a nifty song choice and my friends spontaneously bursting into choreographed back up dancing. Not that that stops me bursting into song on a regular basis, it'd just be nice if people stopped looking at me so strangely when I did.

8: Really embarassing guilty pleasure. I'll show you mine if you show me yours. And mine is pretty embarassing.
You mean other than the fact I eat a whole tube of chips, douple dip them, once farted in front of my boss and burst in song at random intervals? hmmm...

Oh! I got one. I totally love to watch the TV show Wife Swap. The U.S. version. It's hideous, trashy, horrible, horrible T.V. and I love it!!! If you don't know what I am talking about you haven't lived! They take two familes, diametrically opposed in their lifestyle and beliefs, then make the women live in each others homes for two weeks. Just sit back and watch the familes implode! I call it Train Wreck T.V., I know it's awful, and I shouldn't look, but I am morbidly curious and can't look away.

So there you go folks, more useless random triva about me.

Move over Rachel Zoe...

What does one wear to a family birthday dinner at the local Sizzlers family restaurant?

A pink fairy princess outfit of course.

And how does one accessorise such an outfit?

With pink suede and sequin cowboot boots, naturally!

P.S. The chihuahua in a handbag is so like, last year. Bored Labradors are the new black!

Take that Beyonce!

I don't usually like those posts where all they show is a video clip, but this one demands to be seen, deserves to be seen, and needs no more words....

Anita is a former stay at home Mum, turned comedic phenonmenon. She is a writer and performer, and most recently, winner of the Georgia Author of the Year. More awesomeness can be found at her website.

Panic Stations!

So it seems I have found myself a job. Well, really, it found me. I went along to an employment agency (actually one I used to work for when I was a recruiter!) for one job; a temp admin officer role for my local City Council and ended up with a whole 'nother job! Turns out just before I turned up for the interview, they had gotten a role in that nicely combines my training credentials (that I've barely used) with my knowledge of bookkeeping software (that I haven't used for years. Ahem).

So now I'm panicking on two fronts, possibly three. Actually, more like four.

One, I'm not totally convinced I'm up for the job. Sure, I will be given a crash-course in the software, and I do have the theoretical knowledge of how to train, but still. Eeek! I am trying to remind myself that I do best when given a challenge I need to live up to, and having faith that my brain and ability to take advantage of other people's skills adapt quickly will see me through.

Two, it's a full time job. The first I've had since having GG. This is what really scares me. Yes, I know she's three now, and it's not like she's a tiny baby anymore, but I am really worried about how this will affect us. I know I will miss the time away from her, and I know I am lucky that instead of having to put her in kindy full-time (thus negating it even being worth working anyway), I have a great family who are willing to look after my little Gorgeous Girl, and so I am slightly reassured that she will still have that loving, one-on-one care that young kids need.

But I'm still going to be basically giving up being the main person responsible for caring for her, day to day. Up til now, even though she has been going to kindy two days a week since she was about a year old (three days for a while there when I was living in Brisbane and working part-time), I have been the person responsible for those little ways we all have, the little rituals and sayings and ways that become our memories of our childhoods. I have been the one to teach her and encourage her, read to her, all those things. I have been the one to set the limits of how I would like her to act, and to reinforce those, now I'm giving up control of that, and relying on others to shape her behaviour.

Having just re-read this, I'm aware of how melodramatic I am being, and how I am over-reacting, but it's how I feel right now, like I'm about to give up a big part of being a Mum.

The good part is I guess, is that I am the one who will suffer the most being away from GG. She herself will be going to play with her kindy friends like always, and hanging out the other days with some of her favourite people, no doubt being spoiled and indulged.

The saving grace of all this (apart from the much needed financial boost of course!) is that it's a contract role. We're still hashing out the details of how long for etc., and it's true I am hoping it will convert into a permanent role, but I will probably try to negotiate a part-time role moving forward, once the money earned by working full-time has helped us catch up.

So the third reason I'm panicking? It's nearly an hour's drive away. This means not only am I away from GG every weekday, but for a significant length of time each day.

Four, what the hell will I wear?

Does this mean I'm a columnist now?

I am delighted to announce I have been asked to be a regular contributor on the wonderful Sharnanigans website!!

World domination here I come!!!

The contributions will focus a lot on my more spiritual side, my search for Zen and examining some of the issues affecting women today. Given an outlet for this side of me, this will help me get this blog back to what it orginally was, a light-hearted look at motherhood and other stuff that amuses and confuses me. Plus of course, the odd rant. Hey, I'm Quixotic, I've got to tilt at the odd windmill or two, right?

To check out this month's column, an exploration of negative self-talk and snarkiness towards other women, go here. If you're new to my blog, and want to check out the columns that got me a regular gig, check out here and here.

So go show Sharni some love, and congratulate her for recognising my genuis thank her for giving me a go!

And the winner is...

The winner of the $60 voucher for Buyster.com.au is...

drumroll....

drumroll...

envelope please....

Hke68336!!! As decided by the random number generator.

The first two commenters weren't in Australia, so I couldn't include them, sorry. :(

Now here's the tricky part. I'm related to this commenter. I was tempted to run another draw, and also exclude the other family member who commented, but I don't want to punish them just for being related to me (some would say that's punishment enough!!).

So, even though it feels a little hinky, I am going to leave the results as they are, but promise you it was truly a fair draw.

So Hke, get yourself a proper name and email me for the details. And congratulations!

I have so many issues with this.

Fellow Gold Coaster Jesinta Campbell has just been crowned Miss Universe Australia 2010.

I kind of have an issue with the whole Miss Universe thing anyway. Firstly, why is it always an Earthling who wins? Rigged much?

Then of course there is the whole judging women based on their looks issue. Now, now I know it claims to also rate them according to their poise and ability to promote World Peace or whatever it is Miss Universe is supposed to do. If this is truly the case, please see below:

Now, watch this clip of Jesinta completely fluffing her answer during the "interview" section:

And the winner is??

Of course! The beautiful girl who can't string a sentence together!

Okay, that was a bit nasty, yes she did completely stuff up, and even when she kind of pulled herself together and give an answer, sun protection (a very important issue for all Australians) became skin care (a very important thing for beauty industry advertising) and her message lost all it's power. She did however, show some sort of grace in realising she had stuffed up and when she first seizes up and looks plaintively out at the audience, you do kind of think, "Oh, bless her little cotton socks, poor dear."

Given that this pagent wasn't televised, I don't know how well or otherwise the other girls did in their interview section, but given that they are all stunningly gorgeous and know how to work a swimwear and high-heels combo, are the Miss Universe Australia people sure they couldn't have picked a girl who actually managed to speak coherently?

Ah well, all the best Jesinta. However much I detest beauty pagents, I'll be happy for you if you win.

P.S - Don't forget to check out my giveaway - over here!