Thursday, April 29, 2010

"Ham, chicken thighs and public humiliation please"

I've entered into yet another new territory in Parent-land. The one where you find yourself hissing at your child to shh-be-quiet-yes-I-know-but-for-the-love-of-God-just-please-shut-up!

Don't you love each and every new phase that comes along as your little one grows and flourishes under your tender care? Yeah, me neither.

So GG is about to turn 3 in May, and her talking is getting really good, full sentences, very clear and she is a real chatterbox. She's also getting so clear that complete strangers can understand her, and herein lies the problem.

Yesterday, we had a carpenter come to fix some cupboards in the kitchen. GG spend the whole time glaring at him suspiciously and loudly asking, "Mummy, who is that man?" "What's he doing?" "Why is he wrecking the kitchen Mummy?" "Does he need a timeout?" Luckily the guy was lovely and thought she was hilarious.

Then today at the deli counter in Coles, just as the young guy behind the counter took our number, GG yelled out, "Mummy, that man looks like Merlin!!"

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1. Truth be told, he really did, all ears and dark dorky hair, but they aren't really qualities most people want brought to public attention.

2. Yes, GG watches Merlin. Sub-prime parenting I realise, but something about it really catches her attention, she will sit and watch a whole episode, and she never sits still. When I ask her if she finds any part scary, she looks at me with derision and says, "It's just pretend Mummy".

So back to the weird-lookin kid. I think he missed it the first time, but GG kept saying it, over and over, louder and louder. I muttered under my breath, "Uh-huh, that's nice honey, oh look over there!" but she wasn't to be deterred. "But he really does Mummy! He looks just like Merlin!"

As I am trying to shush her, and looking around wildly at the other customers sniggering behind their hands, I glance up and lock eyes with the guy. "Did she just say I looked like Merlin?"

"Ummm, well, yes but if it makes you feel any better, she really likes Merlin. And of course she means the young version, you know from the TV show - not the old guy with the beard, I mean of course not, you don't have a beard do you AHAHAHAHA". (Okay, so I babble when I'm nervous.)

He turns to address GG, "Cool, I like Merlin too. Do you want a cheerio?"

Needless to say, GG's in love.



  1. ahhh childhood ain't it grand.. it is even better when people are understanding and thn encourage your child to continue to be so chatty lol...

  2. The cool thing about this is that I can just HEAR that I mean Aussie accent on your daughter! It sounds so adorable!

  3. You know, we want them to hurry up and learn to talk and then we can't shut them the heck up! Makes me crazy. My kids were always very young, very clear speakers. Once, my son was with my mom in a toy store and saw a little girl with a Barbie. He was disgusted (I'm not a Barbie fan, so I *may* have had something to do with this), looked at my mom and said, "Why would anyone buy thier kid a gold-digging bimbo?"

    Parenting Fail on my part. Oops.

  4. *I mean, their. Can't spell today.

  5. One time? When we lived in a small Montana one with literally ONE black family? A member of that family (who I know, thankfully, and who is very sweet) walked in to a store we were at when Josh was a little over two and we exchanged greetings at which point Joshua, my sweet, sweet, LOUD child yelled, "Mommy, LOOK! A chocolate man!" Isn't it fun when your kids make you want to die?

  6. Oh yes, this phase is FUN! I love how you can acknowledge what they say very very quietly, hoping that will be the end of it. But NOOOO ususally kiddies want a big long discussion about it like you would every other subject which is why they just keep banging on about it getting luder and louder.

    My Big Miss and I have a plan now. If she wants to say something about someone else she sees, she's allowed to tell me, but first she has to say she wants to tell me something in my ear, and then she whispers it and we can have a whispered conversation about the man on crutches, the short old lady or the unfortunate man missing a leg over there. I started this with her at about 3 when it started happening and it works a treat now, as nothing is off limits, she just has to learn to respect others feelings.

    Cute story though, they do make great fodder for blog posts!

  7. Oh yes, love that! My daughter now tells people (ie strangers at the park and shop) intimate, personal details about our family life. It's a real joy!

  8. Oh yes, she's adorable all right!! She said to me this morning "You're an old lady, aren't you Grandma?" Precious little thing!!!

  9. Haha about Merlin. I actually prefer Merlin to Arthur (in terms of looks)..I like the whole nerdy look :)

  10. I think that it was a compliment. That's not a bad looking kid at all. But then, I do love me some GEEK! :D I think GG and I would get along just wonderfully.

  11. Mwahaha, funny. My brother looks like Merlin too. Hence why I can't watch that show....


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