Tuesday, March 30, 2010

A Grand Decision

All week I have been looking forward to having a day off work tomorrow, with 2 year old daughter GG still booked in at kindy. Imagine it!! A whole day, to do with as I please. To go to the shops and not have to enter into negotiations that would make General Ban Ki-moon envious just to be able to try on some clothes. To be able to sit in a cafe and tune out the entire world. To potter round at home and not have some little person creating a wake of chaos behind me as I tidy up. To watch an inappropriate movie on TV and have a shower long enough that I get to shave both legs. Ah, such lofty ideals I have, huh?

Well anyway, as an early Easter present, GG has one-upped me. We were at my Mum’s today for a quick visit as we passed, and she pipes up, “Anma (Grandma), I stay at your place tonight?”. Well, Mum was so chuffed that GG asked to stay of her own volition that she immediately agreed. Being the best Grandma in the world, she actually has everything GG (and six other babies) could possibly need, already at her house. Ever since GG was a tiny baby, she has had a fully stocked room for GG; the cot, playpen, clothes, nappies, bottles, toys, you name it! So all I needed to bring over was the little lady herself. It made it awfully easy to just pop in the car and go visit Grandma. I think that may have been part of her plan...

Anyscheme, I was also thrilled to hear GG ask to stay at her Grandmas. Not because it means a child-free night (although that’s a nice treat), but because I so very much want GG and her Grandma to have a close relationship. I was raised to be very close to all four of my Grandparents, my Mum’s parents lived just up the road and were always very interested in us all, and involved in our lives. They attended school events, watched us play sport, took us out places, had us over at their big old house, we’d even all go on big family holidays, just up to Brisbane, or even just the north end of the Coast, but the point was to be having fun together.

My Dad’s parents lived in a rural area just south of Brisbane, and had a farm with cows, chickens, dogs and the odd rabbit. Nan also bred pedigree Birman cats. My sister and I would spend half each of every school holiday with them, which I’m only just realising how hard it would’ve been for Nan, especially when we were little, but she was always a force to be reckoned with! My sister and I continued to go visit all the way through high school and even beyond, until they moved down to live with us, and then ultimately in a nursing home close by as they got older.

I may not have realised or appreciated it at the time, but a close bond with my Grandparents was invaluable to me growing up. It gave me a separate point of reference than my parents. It gave me people who would love me and spoil me and not concentrate quite so much on the rules that, by necessity, are not relaxed at home. They never undermined Mum or Dad, they always backed up any decision they made, but my Mum was smart enough to know that everyone needs to feel a little bit spoiled, and selfless enough to let that be done by other people.

I have often worried if GG feels she is being foisted off on Grandma sometimes, when Mummy is off doing other fun things. I know she loves her Grandma, Mum has been a big part of her life ever since she was a newborn. They do things together like go to Playgroup every Friday, and Mum has taken her to Play School and Dora concerts, but GG rarely gets a chance to choose to stay over – she is usually told she is going to stay at Grandmas, as a result of me having made plans. So I was really pleased to see GG seek out her company, and reassured that she does see spending time with her “Anma” as a treat, and a chance to be spoiled rotten. And I’m sure that the biscuits Grandma had just given GG in no way influenced her decision. :)

Have fun girls!!!

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9 comments:

  1. Oooh I could have written the exact post! (Except for the part about having a day to myself tomorrow, unfortunately!)
    It's wonderful to see the bond they have with their grandparents although I too worry that the girls feel they're shoved off their while I galavant!

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  2. Bless! The Bebito calls my Mama "Anma" too. Today he carried around a photo of her and kept kissing it and insisted it lived on the TV cabinet. I guess he likes her! :) Tis lovely to know they are fostering relationships with these wonderful Grandparents. And as for you, I hope you enjoy your night & have an awesome day tomorrow (I am treating myself tomorrow to some non-toddler time too!).

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  3. Gorgeous! I was just saying to Dave over dinner how cool it is that his parents are coming here tomorrow and at Easter we will be having lunch with my parents, dave's parents AS WELL AS MY grandma!! (Who is 91!)
    I was just saying how I will have to take a photo of this occassion everyone all together. Monte has a beautiful relationship with my parents has known them since he was born and I am thrilled at the relationship he has with his Great Grandma, it makes me melt because he has started cuddling Grandma, the joy on both of their faces is beyond words. So what a hoot for you for GG to choose to stay there even if it was under the influence of biscuits haha, you have some great me-time! Don't feel guilty about that!! Live it up sister!!! Wow , an epic. Well it is a blue moon.

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  4. That's so sweet that she wants to spend time with her grandma and it's so nice to have a child free night. Isabella is spending Wednesday with my mom so I can get some good cleaning done and watching some trashy TV.

    I have an award for you at my blog.

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  5. Over from SITS!

    I WISH I could leave my kids at grandma's - but I don't trust her! lol

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  6. How sweet! For you and Grandma both...;)

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  7. Ooooooh, does it get any better than that? FREE time! Woo-Hoo! AND you don't have to worry about her because you know she's in good hands. The best!

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  8. Q,
    I love this post! Very sweet relationship she has with your Mum!

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